Dudes, I'm losing ground in the contest. Puh-leeeeeze go here and vote for little old me - it's easy peasy lemon squeezy. I'd REALLY love to be in the top 15 when this thing ends, but would still be happy with the top 25. Remember, there's a pony in it for you. Thank ye kindly!!
When I got home from work yesterday, I was instructed to read the stories that each of my kids had dictated to our nanny, who dutifully transcribed them onto construction paper (archival, of course) for posterity's sake. I thought they were too good not to share, plus, let's be completely honest, it gets me out of writing a blog post at 10 p.m. the night before. Sheesh - you'd think it was homework or something. I have added in some of my own parenthetical commentary, just for shits and giggles. Anyhoo,here we go, kids.
Once Upon A Time...
There lived a princess and a price. They had some orange juice and some milk (disgusting), and lots and lots of water (probably to get rid of the vomitous taste of orange juice and milk). Then a vampire came. Then a ghost. Then the superhero scared them away. Then a monster came. Then the superhero scared him away. Then another monster came! Then a ghost came! (I don't know why with the exclamation points all of a sudden - maybe these superheros and monsters require them, the way Kardashians require approximately 17 pounds of makeup each). Then the ghost and the monster turned the princess into a toad. Then the superhero came. Then a zombie comed and the bridge closed (bridge? what bridge???). Then they lived happily ever after. The end!
Gavin Frankie (aka A.D.D. Boy)
Once Upon A Time...there was a mean witch and men frog. Then the princess kissed the prince and he came alive. He wasn't dead, he closed his eyes for too long (is this my husband we're talking about)? The end.
Once Upon A Time...a swirley poo, then a doughnut came (duh, when DON'T a swirley poo and a doughnut come together????). Then the bad witch came, then the fan came and blew them away.
Once Upon A Time...It was Easter. They were all playing. Then they found some candy and the Easter Bunny. They ate the whole thing and they threw up (natch). Then a superman squirted the bad guys.
(Simon apparently is FULL of fairytales)
Once Upon A Time...first there was a princess, then a prince, then a queen, then a king. They had a tea party with cups and a teapot. They had tea to drink. The princess and the prince had some orange juice (what is it with my kids and orange juice in their fairytales?). Then the guards saw the bad guy and the drawbridge closed. Then a superman came and then a monster came (again with the superman and the monster - they're working overtime today). Then the superman scared him away. The end.
(I love how Scarlett's story starts out like an actual story, and it's so much more a chick flick, what with the tea part and cups and teapot....)
Dress: Twelfth Street by Cynthia Vincent
Jacket: Newport News
Scarf: Gift from my sis
Sarah Paulson Pops Up In Purple Prada
1 hour ago