Tuesday, January 24, 2012

WWD: Barf O Rama

I am writing this whilst watching last week's Project Runway All Stars, and the challenge to the designers was to create a dress for a celebrity. That celebrity? Miss F@#king Piggy. This may not be a popular opinion, but I frigging HATE the Muppets. Like HATE. THEM. It is K-I-L-L-I-N-G me to listen to the designers talk about a puppet like she is an actual living, breathing, human being. I seriously don't know if I can make it through to the end.

Someone just said "I've seen a lot of photos of Miss Piggy, and she has really pretty legs." IT'S A FUCKING PUPPET, PEOPLE.

  (don't be jealous of my Mad Acting Skillz...)

Oh sweet Jeebus on a Cheezit, even JOANNA COLES has been sucked into the Miss Piggy ass-kissing. Did the Muppet conglomeration underwrite this entire episode of Project Runway???? Give me strength.

You can't tell me there's not one designer there who is thinking "What the EFF are we doing creating a look for Miss Piggy??? Where the hell is the Cher challenge? The Gaga challenge? Hells bells, even a Jessica Simpson challenge..."

And if someone could send Kenley to elocution school, I would appreciate it. I cannot STAND the whiny way in which she says EVERYTHING. I will give you that she has the prettiest, shiniest hair (suck on THAT, Kyle Richards), but UGH to everything else.

Even Isaac Mizrahi couldn't be bothered to show up for the runway show.

Angela Lindvall, knock it off we the "We're HONORED to be in the presence of a true superstar" shit. I just threw up in my mouth.

Michael - get over yourself. You made a short, strapless dress with an uneven hem that looks like you ripped off of Rami's design a few weeks ago. Build a bridge and get over yourself. Uh oh, I just saw Kenley's dress, and so far, it's my favorite. I can't help it. Yes, she threw a GINORMOUS pink pouf of tulle on the model's head and called it a hat, but I still like it. Good Gawd - I just realized something - if I like that, I AM MISS PIGGY. Noooooooo!!!!!!

Has Mood been REALLY pushing their stock of feathers on the models? Cuz there are an awful lot of em on the runway. COME ON, KARA - what the hell is that crap? What's the deal with the elbow length hot pink satin gloves? Blech. Anthony - MORE FEATHERS. Rami - another giant pink tulle AND FEATHER hat. Mila - FINALLY - a decent, wearable dress. Love it. Gordana - is that a nightie from Woolworths, circa 1972? Austin What The Eff Is That Hot Mess Scarlettttttt????

UGH - the "comedy" that they are providing is making me cringe with embarrassment for everyone involved.


And a 6-hour-challenge NEXT week? I think PRAS has officially jumped the shark.

Thus concludes my half-assed jeedging of the show. Are you watching along wif me? Chime in if ya have a hankerin' to.

Blouse (sounds SO 1979, doesn't it???): Macy's
Pants: Zara. Like you din't already know that.
Shoes: Vince Camuto. Ditto.
Urrings: ABC Trading Co.
Belt: Thrifted



Girlie Blogger said...

Nice shirt. Such pretty color and print.


bahaha...I am seriously laughing out loud at my computer! Who the eff says that Miss Piggy has nice legs?! That is weird and awkward on soooooo many levels. Get it together people!

Mommy Moxie said...

So missed the Miss Piggy challenge last week and caught it before the gelato episode. As I watched it, all I could think was WHAT THE EFF?!? Not a highlight in PR history. If I would have been one of the designers I would have shat myself in shame making clothes for a puppet. Obviously the designers didn't know what to make of the challenge either because the clothing was sub-par. Only 2-3 decent dresses in the lot.

This week? Better, although Michael needs to stop draping (almost) everything. Mondo's dress was divine- I would wear that, leaky nursing boobs and all.

So who's your favorite to take it all?