Thursday, April 21, 2011

T3: Tummy Tuck Timeline Thursday

Guess who got up and made their own breakfast AND LUNCH yesterday? This guy. Things really felt like they turned a corner yesterday in terms of pain. Don't get me wrong - my lady bits are still swollen as hell (oh, hadn't I mentioned that before? Yup - because of the crotchless binder I'm wearing, gravity does its thang and forces all that pressure you-know-where).
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The good thing is that instead of walking 90 degrees hunched over (like a 187-year-old woman), I feel like I'm more at 45 degrees hunched, walking like a spring chicken of 87 years young. Speaking of spring chickens, thank hebbins I got the kiddos their Easter basket stuff last weekend, so this weekend we can hide it and have a hunt in the yard provided the weather cooperates. I may or may not have gotten an extra box of Cadbury Creme Egg minis which I fully intend to eat. Does anyone else like those or am I the only one? I mean, in theory they are disgusting, yet in real life? DELICIOUS.
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Poop Watch 2011? Is still on. Yep - still waiting for doody to call. Unfortch all the meds I'm on cause constipation, so I have started popping Colace on top of them. Nice. I really can't wait to get to the point when I can stop the meds, because I'm tired of feeling tired and groggy all the time. An addict I am not (unless we're talking Cadbury Creme Eggs, then all bets are off).
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I am also getting itchy all up in the hizzouse under my binder and gauze, but that could also be because I discovered yesterday it is apparently doubling as a crumb-catcher. I have eaten more Ritz crackers this week than I have in my entire life, and virtually every crumb has fallen down my shirt and into the binder edge. I'll have to apologize to the nurse when she sees me next time for being so slovenly.
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Another thing I can't wait for? A FRIGGING SHOWER. This morning I resorted to ye olde whore's shower, scrubbing my pits and parts with a wash cloth. Well, on THAT note, I'll leave you to your day. I can't tell you how much it means that you're sticking with me through these updates that clearly provide too much information, and your comments rully, truly have cheered me up.

Merci!
Shan

9 comments:

Renee said...

On the poop thing. I had to be on meds like that before and it was horrible. My Mom is a vegetarian and she had me eat one tablespoon in the morning and one at night of ground flax seed. It makes it easier to go and makes it like soft service ice cream. LOL Also try not to eat the crackers they tend to bind you up. LOL If you don't like the taste of just the flax seeds by themselves (I love them plain) you can add them to yogurt. Also chocolate can be a natural diuretic. You can buy flax seed already ground up in the grocery store near the flours and baking stuff. You can also buy whole ones and grind them in a coffee grinder. :)

Natasha said...

Is there a poop pool? I'll take Saturday between 9 and 2 for $5.00. Who's gonna bet me????

406 Olivia said...

Poop pool--hahahahaha! I swear by Smooth Move (a delicious licorice-flavored herbal tea). Have the hubs pick it up at Target.

So glad you're feeling better...

this free bird said...

You've been on my mind and I feel like a big *ss failure for not sending a crate of mini eggs and a 40 of Don Julio. Then again I don't think you should drink & drug.

Here's to dukey on the horizon!!

xo,
Carrie

Carly said...

Obviously they are different surgeries but ALL of your dirty lil deets are reminding me of after I had lil man (via c section). The no shower for a few days...the itchiness...the feeling like a truck ran over (scratch that...parked on) my lower abdomen....
Thinking of you during the pain, constipation and hope you have a SPEEDY recovery.
C

Paula said...

I just spit my drink out over the poop pool! And oh the whore's bath... here's hoping you can bathe soon.

oomph. said...

aaaand, she's up! baby steps, baby steps! you're almost there, girl!

rockoomph.blogspot.com

GiGi said...

a crumb catcher. i am peeing.
and i hope you are pooping.
xo

Dominic Tucks said...

Thanks for sharing this. I really appreciate personal accounts of tummy tuck experiences. Keep it up.