Thursday, February 17, 2011

Stuff We Would Kiss On the Mouf: Shoe Porn

I decided over the weekend that I needed a pair of black pumps with studs up the back in my life, and set about searching for the perfect pair. I found a few options that were peep toes. Nope. No want-a da peep toe in this particular shoe. I wanted a platform, somewhat rounded toe. Imagine my DELIGHT when I came across them in a magazine tonight. People, I present to you The Vince Camuto Malaya:

Those. Are. Perfection. And they will be mine. Oh yes, they WILL be mine. I think they're pretty affordable too, at $118. Now that we have THAT outta the way, I decided to hop over to Alloy, because I am sorry, but they have KEYOOT shoes for CHEAP. Please feast your eyeballs on my favey crocketts below:

Okay, know how I said that one time that I didn't want peep toes? Well THESE I could live with. Come ON - that Mexican blanket print? The CORK WEDGES?????

Or how about these faux raffia platforms? I'll take two please (one for each foot....DUH)....


CORK PLATFORM?!!!!!#$!#$!@#$!@#$ Hell to the YES.
J'adore these faux suede grey strappy wedgy pieces of eye candy. Or is that foot candy? Hmmmm...
And these funkay (peep toe) booties? Normally I LOATHE a peep toe bootie, because if it is cold enough to warrant a bootie, then I do not want my toes peeping out. These seem springy to me, though, plus I just love the shape of the heel, so they are keepers.
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While we're talking about things I loathe, let me be frank. People who are wearing your pajamas out in public, meet me at camera three.
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PUT YOUR EFFING CLOTHES ON. I saw a lady in Target yesterday who was CLEARLY wearing her big old flannel printed pajama pants with a baggy sweatshirt, and I groaned aloud and rolled my eyes. It is like an involuntary spasm or tic, whenever I see someone wearing pajamas in public. It is all I can do to go up to them and say, "I got dressed today - why didn't YOU????!!!" It is literally offensive to me to see. I'm not saying you have to get dressed up. JUST GET DRESSED, for the love of Bea Arthur. Put on a frigging pair of jeans and a tee shirt and call it a day. Call me shallow, tell me there are more important things to get upset about, but I don't care. I yam what I yam. It's all I can stands, and I can't stands no more.
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Okay - glad I got that off my chest. On that note, I will leave you to peruse Vince Camuto and Alloy and purchase any and all of the above for me in a size 8. Thank you, and good night.
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Merci!
Shannan

8 comments:

Marie a la Mode said...

I'm all hot and bothered looking at these shoes now! And I agree with you on the pajama's. Get dressed for chrissake! You know what else I hate? Men who wear jogging pants with the elastic band around the ankle with sneakers. I can't handle it!

Jackie said...

I've been drooling over those Vince beauties too! I hope you get them-you deserve it girl! And get them before thy sell out cuz I have a feeling they will.

livingladurée said...

I'm heading strait away to buy the "missoni-esqe" mexican blanket pumps. LOVE! Thanks for the shoe candy!

Amy

this free bird said...

okay seriously i laughed out loud several times.

and i want those mexican cork ones, too. digging in couch for change.

xo,
c

FRANKIE HEARTS FASHION said...

First of all, I too GASP at the sight of PJ's in public...WTF?! Like seriously? ANd second of all can I just say hell to the yes on the grey wedges?! Wowza! xo

Jenn from Much to My Delight said...

Those patterned cork wedges RULE!! I've never seen anything like those. They are stellar.

"For the love of Bea Arthur" might be my new favorite phrase, by the way. Well done.

Freelance Shop-A-Holic said...

Eff me.

Jenny said...

OMG in love with the cork wedges and the cork pumps - fab-u-lous!!!