Wednesday, January 26, 2011

WWD: Feeling Euphemistic...

I don't know about ya'll (ya'll? where are all these ya'lls coming from lately, Britney???) - but my right brain is directly affected by Aunt Flo. For real - I feel a complete lack of inspiration, humor, and creativity this week, and guess who's visiting? The old beyotch herself.

It's actually pretty frigging amazing that I was able to put together this outfit today, because I am ridin the cotton pony, so to speak. In fact, I had to google "euphemisms for menstruation" to come up with that one. I don't know if you know this, but there are some GOOD ones out there. Let's share, shall we?

Before we start, let me just say - I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS POST HAS RESORTED TO THIS. Muy apologios in advanceio. You didn't know I spoke Spanish, did you? Let's continue.

Some of my favorites:
1. Miss Scarlett's come home to Tara
2. I'm trolling for vampires.
3. I've had a dishonorable discharge from the uterine Navy.
4. I'm saddling old Rusty.
5. Feelin' menstru-riffic! (I could've written that one myself...)
6. Clean up in aisle one!!
7. Massacre at the Y
8. T-minus 9 months and holding...
9. Game day for the crimson tide
10. Taking Carrie to the prom
11. Playing banjo in Sgt. Zygote's ragtime band
12. Ordering l'omlette rouge
13. Arts and Crafts week at Panty Camp
14. Rebooting the Ovarian Operating System
15. Walking along the beach in soft focus
.
So did I miss any? Hells yes I did. There are a buttload of em out there. Share your favorites here. This is a safe place. Oh, and if you were disgusted by the post and did not find it in the least bit funny? You're probably a man.
.
Sequin Tee: Loft
Blouse: Vintage, gifted (thanks Amy Bo Bamy - are you EVER coming back? Sigh....)
Jean: Old Navy
Boots: Charlotte Russe
Necklaces: Vintage, Thrifted, Gifted
Rings: F21, Charming Charlie's
Bracelet: F21
.
Merci!
Shan

8 comments:

Renee said...

My hubby knows he is not getting any when I tell him Aunt Flo and Uncle Red are visiting and will be in town for the next 7 days. They like to pack heavy. LOL

SGM said...

Riding the cotton pony! Ah, thank you for the memories, Shan. I had a friend in college who would say that and I found it very LOL. Still do. Although I have to say, when I saw that your brain was affected by Aunt Flo, my initial thought was "Kiss My Grits" Flo? And I was confused. But I too am visiting the red tent and my brain is not working. So I get it now, and I thoroughly enjoyed this post. (Flo tends to make me ramble as well).
Love this blog like I love Def Leppard, Van Halen and the old GnR combined.

Jenny said...

LOL! Well, I'm not getting the Christmas gift without the green bow this week, but I have changed my birth control pills to ones with a higher level of estrogen and I'm a little "tense" (let's just say the word of the week begins with f and ends in uck - dropped that bomb more than I ever have). I almost picked up that sequined shirt today at Loft, but sadly did not. I may have to go back!

livingladurée said...

I always say I've had a visit from Aunt Flo, or I'm ridin the crimson wave! Love this post...I'd say I wet my panties laughing but that could be gross:)

Amy

Linda said...

Oh man, this is hilarious! One of the many reasons I love you. Thank you for the education.

this free bird said...

I am seriously pissing my pants laughing. That ho stopped by here late last week...the ol' red ant. That's what I call her. My red ant's in town. However massacre at the y may need adopting. WTH!!

AHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Mommy Moxie said...

OMG, "ridin' the cotton pony" is hysterical as well as numerous others on this list. I too have had Little Red Bleeding Bitch in town this week and would just like to curl up in a bloated ball and die. Sometimes being a girl really sucks...

MerciBlahBlah said...

Oh thank GOD people commented on this post. After I put it up and hadn't seen any comments, I was all - uh ohhhh, I've REALLY offended people. Shwew! Nice to know that there ARE some people out there who are as immature as I am...

Mwah!
Shan