Monday, October 18, 2010

WWD: In The Gym

This is why I love blogging: because I'm inspired everyday to re-edit and remix my clothing in ways I hadn't thought of before, thanks to those blogs I peruse on a regular basis. Today's ensemble is a shmorgishborg of blogging inspiration, from Aureta's Blog's ladylike silhouette to Second Skin's badass belts to The Daybook's kickass OTK socks.

(Dress, vintage/thrifted; Belt, Target; Socks, Delia's)

It's actually a little strange, how strong my love of OTK socks is, considering the traumatic OTK Sock Event I experienced in middle school (or MIDDEW school if you're Russell Brand). Imagine this: the dorkiest of all dorks (me) - shy, skinny, short (the trifecta of middle school maximum dorkitude), glasses, bad perm, gym class. Our uniforms were TRES HORRIBLE: black double knit polyester coaches shorts (so big on me they came just under the not-yet-there boobs and so long they came almost to my knees), mustard and gold striped shirts (HEEEE-YOUGE - I mean, I could've worn it as a dress, but I tucked it into my shorts and I swear you could see the hem under the ends of the shorts, and it bunched most unappealingly around the belly). Oh, and also, I was wearing my favorite socks, which weren't typically OTK socks, but since I was a shortie, they came up over my knees if I pulled them all the way up, which I did. And also, they were white socks with a black and red Fair Isle knit pattern in them. I loved them. Ohhhh how I loved them.

So the girls' class was waiting in line to go down to the locker rooms, and the accordion doors were open so we could see the boys' side, who were also lining up. Someone thought it would be HILARIOUS to "de-pants" someone, and guess who they de-pantsed? This guy.

Mmmm-hmmmm. There I stood, face so red it was almost purple, my ears bursting into flames from embarrassment, trying to pull up my shorts (oh, and by the way, they also pulled down my underwear as well).
(Urrings, local boutique; Necklace, Design Spark)
Never had I been so glad that my shirt was enormous on me, as it thankfully hid all my lady-bits from the entire gym.
Luckily I was not permanently scarred from such an experience, but as I said, it's a miracle to me that my love of the tall sock has continued through the years. Oh, it waned a bit in the 80s, when all I wanted to wear was a decent pair of neon ankle socks, but it has come back around.
(Shoes, Charlotte Russe)
And to those girls who de-pantsed me in school? I saw you at the 20th reunion. You ain't got NOTHIN on me now, beyotches.


Sydney said...

hahahaha!! I LOVE it! You crack me up! Those socks look HOT!

I love your writing style. IT. IS. THE. BOMB. Thanks so much for doing that post on my little blog! You are just WAAY too nice!! xoxo :)

MerciBlahBlah said...

Wellllll thank you kindly, ma'am!!! I appreciate your appreciation. Or something like that.


406 Olivia said...

I decided to drop 45 pounds so we can share clothes. I want that dress!

Funny about how those mean girls peaked in junior high, then grew up, got fat and started wearing mom jeans. I hope you flirted with their husbands at the reunion.


SGM said...

I am so glad that there is a happy conclusion to this story. You look smokin' in the OTK socks and those depantsers have lady-mustaches and bad breath (I'm reading btw the lines).

ALSO, I was killing time while waiting for my daughter at a bday party and ended up at Target. Tons of Tucker, 30% off. I tried everything on, and then I wept quietly in the dressing room b/c I am on major hardcore shopping hiatus. But still. It was worth it. I thought of you.

FortyNotOut said...

I do love how you tell a story...I can just picture it. I was dork of Dorkville at school so I feel your pain Honey. And may I say... nice pumpkins you have there! xx

this free bird said...

woman you're rad. i love that necklace (locked in mind since cali) and you rock a sock like no other. to those ho's who depantsed you? karma's a bitch. i trust it would be much worse having one's child depants you in the middle of the grocery store right around, say, 5pm.


MerciBlahBlah said...

Olivia - no thanks - their husbands were fat and bald. That's the best ending of ALL.

Emily - I just cried a salty tear for your Tucker loss, and I had one of those 30% off pieces in my own cart and PUT IT BACK because I am TRYING to stop shopping. That was after I blew my load at Charlotte Russe.

Forty - why THANK YOU! It's not everyday someone compliments my pumpkins...

Carrie - wait - did I miss a story? Depantsed in the middew of a grocery store at rush hour????