Monday, April 26, 2010

Oreo, You are Dead To Me

Seriously. In the immortal words of Tom Petty, don't come around here no more. There is absolutely no reason on God's green earf why you need to taunt me with your perfectly round, perfectly chocolate and cream center goodness, so that I eat twelvity-five of you at each sitting. GO AWAY, OREO.

I am riding high from the conversation I had this weekend at the gym with a random girl who asked if I lifted weights, and when I said yes, she said, "I thought so, because your arms look great." As I told Amy, at that point I kissed her and then we made out in the back room amidst the stability balls (tee hee...balls....) and resistance bands.

So go away, Oreo. I don't need you in my life. I'm riding that compliment all the way to my goal weight.

Merci!
Shan

Amy here:

To which I told Shan she was a trollop (okay I didn't use that word) because I would only make out with girls whilst inebriated. I mean HAD I KNOWN all I had to do was tell her she had nice arms...

That is all.

Almost. I think Shan's goal weight is the same goal my right thigh has. But that's cool because I'm not negative about it anymore, I just like to joke. THANKFULLY I'm still in my newfound self-love mode. Man life is better without ragging myself in the mirror all the time. If ya'll haven't, you should try it. Life is short. (This is starting to sound like Ferris Bueller.)

Merci,
Ames

3 comments:

Jools said...

So funny that you wrote about this today -- just last night, I was silently cursing the Boy for bringing home Oreos, as I sat there eating four with a big glass of milk (yep, goodbye any positive effects of the super healthful dinner I cooked!). I shall endeavor to follow your lead, reminding myself that buying a new, smaller wardrobe will be way more delightful than scarfing down more evil Oreos!

SGM said...

Oh, thank you for reminding me that I have Oreos hidden in my kitchen right now. I am going to forget the healthy part of post because I REALLY WANT TO EAT SOME OREOS.

MerciBlahBlah said...

Jools - Oh, I totally scarfed six in about two minutes this weekend, and I don't even want to THINK about how many I ate in the car on the way home from the zoo with the kiddos. Blech.

SGM!!!! Meluvs when you comment. Supah dupah giant puffy heart you and your hidden Oreos.

Shansies