Monday, September 7, 2009

Stuff We Would Punch In the Mouf: Project Runway

Yes, you read that right. What the crap is going on with the craptastic crap that was churned out this week? For real. I think overall the challenge was crap, and the looks were crap, but that's just me. Did anyone actually LISTEN to the challenge? A surf-inspired look? I can think of only two or three from everyone's that fit into it. Sigh. Let's forge ahead then...

Amy: Ditto, my friend. DITTO. Still waiting for this season to catch its groove.

The Winner: Top Ra'mon

Shan: Though this team was actually Ra'Mon and Mitchell, I can't in good conscience even include Mitchell in the win, since the only thing I saw him doing was ironing some strips of God knows what that ended God knows where. And this dress won? I don't even think it's as horrible as some bloggers do, but I definitely didn't think it deserved to win. I liked his idea of splashing the dye on it, and the color combo he used to do it, but does a splashy dye job equate to an avant garde look? Mais non. If this dress were executed better, it might have been cool, but cool enough to win? Meh...

Amy: Needs some fixing in the fit department but I actually really like this quite a lot. I mean it's no neoprene scuba suit but.....

Shan: Hey - din't I say that below????

The Looo-hooo-ser: Mitchell

Shan: What the CRAP about this dress says surfer girl? I mean, it's a nice dress and all, even if the boobs are wonky, but this does not a surfer girl look make, even if they did put it over a bathing suit.

Amy: I'd like to just say a couple of words in Mitchell's honor: SEE YA!

SHOULD Have Lost: Nicolas and Gordana

Shan: For the love of Pamela Anderson Lee-Rock-Soloman-Lee-just Anderson, this looks more hoochie than the ladies at the Million Dollar Fantasy Ranch, the local bewbie bar. Not only does this scream "This should've gotten Nicolas sent home, suckaaaa!" it also screams "Me love you long time...." Epic fail.

Amy: I have to say that I actually think this outfit is great. Great for those occasions when your "My bagina is down here" arrow t-shirt is at the cleaners, because really, is anyone NOT looking at her hoo ha in this picture?

Should Have Won:

Shan: I'm torn between these next looks. None of them completely wowed me, but at least they weren't lace unitards.


Shan: I thought this was the closest to a surf-girl inspired look than anything else. Cute retro print? Check. Halterrific neckline and bodice? Check check. Fun flowy skirt? Gotcha covered.

Amy: I concur. I actually love the retro Hawaii print and I think the construction on this is great. I can dig it. I cannot dig Epperson though. I was realllllllly turned off by him this week.

Johnny and Irina:

Shan: It took me a few looks at this outfit to really like it, and now, in the words of David Cassidy, when he was still with the Partridge Family, I think I love you. Especially the back. Love the sexy drape of the back, the off-the-shoulder look, and the macrame goin on. Who'd have thunk?

Amy: FINALLY...a surfer girl look. Okay, not that I know any surfer girls here in St. Louis, but in my head they would wear this. It's casual, and interesting and easy breezy beautiful surfer girl.

Althea and Louise:

Shan: Cute, but nothing spectacular. Still, I thought it at least fit the surfer girl theme.

Amy: I don't hate it but something in the bewb area needs some attention. There's either not enough of the stripe to make it make sense or something. I don't even know what I'm saying anymore.

Shirin and Daryl Carol Hannah:

Shan: Ditto above

Amy: Coming from the girl that has 837 maxi dresses, this may come as a shock...this kind of bores me. It's not terribew, it just isn't anything I haven't seen. (in my multiples)

Nicolas and Gordana:

Shan: I didn't get what the judges looooooved about the macrame top of this thing. I mean, it was okay, and HELLA better than the lace unitard, and the pants were kind of cool, but it didn't blow me out of the water. I mean, it was no neoprene scuba suit with dye splashed on it, for the love of Ra'Men Noodles.

Amy: I am so in love with these pants. They remind me of a crazy print vintage pair I had years ago that you basically put on like a diaper. Big swath of fabric through the legs, tie the back then bring the back flaps up to the front and tie. You know? A diaper. Now I have the sads because I wish I still had them. I also hope the next time I'm wearing something you put on like a diaper it is not made by Depends.
Logan and Christopher:

Shan: It's like the torso of Go-Go Barbie got stuck on the legs of Beetlejeuce Barbie.

Amy: Now they are just being ridiculous.

Logan and Christopher:

Shan: In theory, I should like this. Shiny pants? Check. Vee-neck tunic? Check check. Yet there is something about it that is off for me - the proportions just don't seem quiiiiite right. Or maybe it's the My Fair Lady hat plopped on her head.

Amy: You should like this, Shan.
Shan: I should, and yet I don't. Hmmmm....

Johnny and Irina:

Shan: Am I the only one who thinks the actual runway show goes by WAY too quickly? I mean, they barely show some of these looks. This one isn't too bad. I wouldn't necessarily call it avant garde, and it seems like there is an awful lot of "giant corsage on one shoulder" looks this season, but still, compared to some of the other stuff, I actually think Johnny and Irina should've maybe won the challenge for their combined efforts.

Amy: No, you are not alone. And yet you are very, very alone. In the end, all you have is yourself. But about this dress...I like the idea of it a lot more than I like the execution of it. It's a little messy.

Epperson and Qrystillllllllle:

Shan: No. Just no.

Amy: This look says, "I give up."

Shirin and Daryl Carol Hannah

Shan: This is a pretty cool look. I think ya'll know I loves me some peacock blue, and I dig the silhouette of this dress, but what's going on with the model's hair here? It should've been something big and tall to balance out the dress, instead of being slicked back. Maybe it's just the angle I'm looking at here, but she is suffering from a majah case of Tiny Head Syndrome.

Amy: I can get behind this. She's like a Sea Siren in this. A Sea Siren with a thimble for a head.

Althea and Louise

Shan: One of my favorite of the "Non" Avant Garde Avant Garde looks. I loved the detail on the bodice - the use of the pins was perfection, and even though I would've preferred the skirt to be all short like it is in the front, I still thought this rocked.

Amy: Yeth, if the skirt was balanced out my eyeballs would be grateful. Still one of the best hands down.


Blushing hostess said...

I was really trying not to revisit this. Agreed. Abyssmal.