Friday, August 14, 2009

Stuff We Do In Private: Chicag "Ohhhhhhhhh"

me: I was totally going to do a TV post like the one you did last night but was at my charity mtg til 10:45! Will add to later.

Shannan: Ohhhhh SURE you were.....

me: Oh no, you are not stepping to me with that tone.
(6 minutes pass)

me: The crickets. So. Loud. Onnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnne is the loneliest number that you..........Me and my shaaaaaaaaaaaaadow

Shannan: I DID step to you. What are YOU going to do about it?

me: IM myself apparently.

Shannan: or not

me: Don't even try and tell me it's the babies again. Needy babies.

Shannan: durrrrrrr it's ALWAYS the babies.

me: I thought I told you to secretly replace their Folgers with a nice Pinot night night cocktail.

Shannan: DOH - I forgot!!!! I thought it was Mad Dog 20/20

me: Sure, I mean, if you wanna give up your hooch. HOOCH! I said hooch. Sheesh. Perv.

Shannan: Wanker

me: Check usage of "wanker" off To Do List. SUCCESS! Oh, and I don't care if it's all water or even 1.5 lbs from each bewbie - I am down 3 el bees since Monday now. At this rate I should be able to start binging again in about 4 weeks. Wanna come crawl inside some cupcakes wif me and eat our way out?

Shannan: I've already used wanker TWICE this morning. I just told Scarlett to stop being a wanker.

me: Niiiiiiiiiiiiice.

Shannan: NO - go away with your evil cupcakes, devil woman! THREE LBS??????

me: Word up.

Shannan: Are you trying to make the rest of us look like slackers?!!! Pace yourself!

me: Dude, just proves how much extra I have on me that I need to lose. It's like Week One of Biggest Loser all up in here.

Shannan: OOOH - I forgot to mention BL on my Open Letter to Amy. I just told Tom that PR starts next week, and he SPAT at me. Said "I don't care about that CRAP." As if.

me: Are you sure you didn't just tell Paul that? Although Paul's comment would come with some disapproving "silly Amy" look.

Shannan: oh, maybe THAT"s why he looked different. Jerks the both of them.

me: Wankers. The pair.

Shannan: Buggers

me: We're gonna have to recap on Friday, um kaaaaaaaay?

Shannan: Ooooooh - new saying alert! Bugger off, you pervy wanker!!! Ummm kaaaay

me: BOYPW it is!

Shannan: Glad we got THAT settled

me: Yes, that was tense for a hot second.

Shannan: I forgot to tell you a story. We were geting our tickets for Chicago the other night, and Tom said,

me: Hode up. Lemme get my cup of cocoa and a blankie. Okee.

Shannan: I wonder if they'll playing right at 8? and I said, you DO know that this is Chicago the Broadway musical, and he said Oh - I thought it was Chicago the group. I said - DANG- I shouldn't have said anything and waited for you to ask when Peter Cetera was coming out. The End.

me: I love that story. You totally should have let him roll with it.

Shannan: I don't think he's QUITE as excited to go now. I know.

me: I'm sure he's thrilled.

Shannan: Then he asked if it was going to be the people in the movie on stage. I said - Uh yeah, Catherine Zeta Jones and Richard Gere will be RIGHT THERE.

me: I would have loved for him to get there and scream "25 or 6 to 4!!!" when the lights dimmed.
Tell Queen Latifah I said "sup", kay?

Shannan: I'm sure we'll be going out with them all after the show.

me: Try not to go on another Hollywood coke bender. I know how you get.

Shannan: don't tell anyone, okay?

me: As someone once told me 6 minutes ago, "Pace yourself." Okay, I'm off. I have to get to W. Check ya later. Have a pleasant morning. Good Morning and Good Luck.


Dare said...

You're my inspiraaaaaaaaaation.....
You bring meaning to my life....
You're my inspiraaaaaa....

okay, so I'm singing to my wine glass at the 'mo.


love you two idiots, and I say that with the utmost respect and drunkality.

It's a word....