Thursday, June 25, 2009

Stuff We Do In Private

From The Archives of Hilarity (aka our past IM chats)...

Shan: don't beat yourself up. how often do you eat sweet tarts? prolly not often, though I also know I would be beating myself up in your shoes too - it's the way I roll.

Amy: every 17 years or so apparently. Did i mention i had half a piece of cake earlier today? and haven't worked out since saturday morning? i'm in a phunk and have got to snap out of it snappy snap snap

Shan: are you going to work out in the next few days?

Amy: oh hells yes i'm going to kill myself until you guys get here or at least injure my person.

Shan: don't do that.

Amy: okay

Shan: live, Amy, liiiiiive

Amy: i've created a monster...

Shan: what is it's name?

Amy: shaaaaaaaaaanaaaaaaaaaan i should go dump these candies in the trash. you ever done that?

Shan: WHAT???? I have run water over something before, and I have DEFINITELY thrown things in the trash to avoid eating them usually crap that my mom leaves here.

Amy: ever taken a bite of something and chewed it and spit it out? ummm, not me.

Shan: I don't think I've done that. if I'm going to chew it, I'm going to swallow it.

Amy: i've spit out chocolate several times

Shan: so I'd rather just not have it in my mouf

Amy: but chocolate is delish

Shan: you did WHAT to CHOCOLATE???

Amy: i know.

Shan: Spit! It! Out! ????

Amy: i'm not proud plus it looks like poo in the trash

Shan: blech pooooooooo I bet it doesn't look like the poo that I saw in a diaper earlier tonight TWICE

Amy: i hope not

Shan: and I'd venture to guess it doesn't smell that bad

Amy: i hope i never have anything in my mouf that could pose as baby shiz

Shan: I am watching Make Me A Supermodel from last night and my boyfriend Jonathan

Amy: just finished earlier

Shan: he SO wants me, and my other boyfriend Sandhurst

Amy: step off

Shan: they were fighting over me earlier YOU STEP OFF WOMAN you have Mayerbag and Kris Allen

Amy: krissssssssss. oh kris. DANG I need a pedicure. that is all.

Shan: yes you do yo feet STANK oh wait - did I say that out loud?

Amy: mmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Shan: peeee-uuuuuuuuu

blah blah blah, not very funny stuff....and we now return you to our hilarity.

Shan: I seriously fall asleep on the couch half the time at 8:30 I CANNOT stay awake to save my life

Amy: Drama much? You're awake now, Meryl Streep.

Shan: SHUT IT. I need some watermelon.

Amy: go get your watermelon on

Shan: I am. go spit out your chocolate - no wait !!!

Amy: okay, go water your melon check ya later.

Shan: you go stuff your bra - WHAT?

Amy: how dare you?

Shan: who said dat?

Amy: !

Shan: oh, I dare - you don't scare me, Amy.

Amy: i will sit on you

Shan: that made me giggle out loud

Amy: when i get the energies. i am like a wizard with that shiz-nit

Shan: buh to the bye on that note

Amy: okay, stop. go. bye. later. mwaaaah.

Shan: poop!