Friday, April 24, 2009

We Interrupt This Regularly Scheduled Fashion Icon Friday

to bring you the following, courtesy of Shan:

So yesterday afternoon I go to the back door to let Kitty in, and look out, and he is sitting there with something at his feet. Before I think about it, I open the door and he runs in. Then I realize the something at his feet is a SNAKE. A. SNAKE. I scream, and think - oh shit - he killed a snake and brought it up to the door. I am still screaming, and the SNAKE, which is CURLED ON MY FRIGGING DOORSTEP LITERALLY, moves, and starts sniffing with his SNAKE FRIGGING TONGUE at the door. My mom was here and said - well get something and flip him out into the yard. To which I said YOU DO IT!!! So she comes in the kitchen, gets in the cabinet and grabs a FORK. To which I say - WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH A FORK???? YOU ARE NOT USING A FORK TO GET A SNAKE OFF MY BACK DOORSTEP. So I grab the broom from the garage, and she sweeps the FRIGGING SNAKE off the FRIGGING DOORSTEP and off the back deck onto the patio below. When he is uncurled, we see that he is about a foot and a half to TWO FEET LONG. He was thin, but I DO NOT NEED A FOOT AND A HALF TO TWO FOOT FRIGGING SNAKE ON MY BACK DOORSTEP!!!!! Go away, FRIGGING SNAKE. We do not need your kind around here. The end.

P.S.What kind of cat sits two inches from a FRIGGING SNAKE and does not do anything about it? A worthless one, that is what!!!