Amy: Oh, I will, Shan. I will.
Stuff I Would Kiss On the Mouf, by Shannan
Amy: Yep. Classic.
I was going to just keep this to a Sequin Pencil Skirt, until I realized that I am either apparently (a) a wannabe show girl, or (b) a bird, pecking at anything sparkley, and love all things bedazzled. I am not talking head to toe sequins, but mixing and matching high end and low end (it's one of the things that homegirl at The Glamourai does best - mixing something high brow, fancy-schmancy (and yes, that is a technical fashion term for those "in the know,") with something Tar-jay or just plain unexpected.
Let me also say - it's not about sequin club wear. For instance, I have been DYING for a silver or platinum sequin pencil skirt ever since I saw Jenna Elfman wear one in the movie Keeping The Faith years ago. I just love the idea of wearing it with a simple black turtleneck and pumps for the office, or a ripped up, rocked out tee and shooties for a date (HA - as if I ever go on dates these days....) If anyone comes across a big pile of money and wants to purchase this Proenza Schouler number for my 40th, I would love you forever. What - it's only $595 - marked down from $850. That's a bargain if you ask me!!!!!
For reals???? My feet are longing for them. They are feeling physical PAIN while my eyes are looking at those shoes.
Well hello, adorable little black and white sequin dress. You would look SO cute with opaque black tights OR over a pair of tuxedo pants...
Dude - with all of the KEYOOT sequin clothing I found on Googley Goog, I could go on and on. Topshop has a veritable buttload of sequined, bedazzled items to choose from. I will continue with my list, howevah...
A) Are you suggesting my sequin tube top and sequin beret outfit is a little much, Shannan. You've changed. I don't even KNOW YOU ANYMORE.
B) I completely agree. That skirt and that dress. Ohmyword.
C) It's pretty hard to beat a vintage black sequin cardigan with a white T and jeans. That is all.
Christian Louboutin Leopard Pumps
Stuff I Would Punch In the Mouf, by Shannan
Newport News Colored Denim
Thank you for playing, Newport News. Try again.
Amy: Newport Oh Noes is more like it. All I have to say is "mmmmmmmmmnnnnnnnnn, uh uh."
Harem or Hammer Pants
I do not care who makes them or how "in" these are, the last time I wore Hammer pants was to my parents' 25th anniversary party, and thank GOD I don't know where any of the photos are, because I was rockin a pair of fuschia silk pants with a giant purple button down blouse, cinched with a gold lame belt. No one needs to see that.
Shan: Ames, I will find you a photo just as soon as the world sees you and G-Money's Flock of Seagulls Olan Mills portrait.
Denim "Outfits" Are Just Capital "R" Wrong, by Amy
It's sad that I knew just where to go to find some of the worst offenders. Thank you, Spiegel "Together" line. You finally came in handy. Together. It's like Garanimals for grown ups. That can't possibly be good. And while the peach ensemble isn't a denim outfit, I would have been remiss not to mention it. WHAT ON EARF IS THAT? I think I figured out where scary eyebrow Stephanie from The Bachelor shops.
Shan: I am thankful that I have NEVER watched The Bachelor in my life, if only because I do not have to witness the travesty that is apparently "Scary Eyebrow Stephanie's" wardrobe. Thank you Jebus. Spiegel, on the other hand, you need to WORK IT OUT.
You know, I (Amy) have so many things I would either kiss or punch in the mouf that could make this the longest post ever. I will stop here though and keep you on the edge of your seats until later. Think of this as the Gateway Post to harder, more addictive posts to come. Just a little taste.
Shan: Ames, I think we just found our next regular feature....